A Warning: Pussy-whipped
Not that we want to give anyone more evidence that we are horrible misogynist women-hating cunts... Well, I am, Crabman's not. He LOVES women. Especially his wife (In case she's reading). I fucking HATE women and regularly fuck them to prove my point. This isn't a boast, especially if you'd seen the lick of the women I fuck. Anyway, to prove why I hate women, I will provide pictorial evidence of how evil they really are -
Yes, in case the fact that you can't guess which film this stub is for, it's PRIDE & PREJUDICE. The film starring Keira Knightley and That Cunt Off SPOOKS about love in the staid world of period unspoken love. And when I say it was a period piece, I mean I enjoyed it as much as I enjoy women's periods. It was AWFUL. Dull, slow, boring, piss-poor acting and DONALD SUTHERLAND, YOU FUCKING SELL-OUT CUNT. So you might be wondering why I, not only, watched this film but went to the cinema and see it. I'll tell you why, because of fucking women.
I have used the justification with Crabman that (a) If I sit through this shit, I could convince The Ex to sit through TRANSPORTER 2 and (b) I might get a BJ out of it. Neither of these excuses hold much water as (a) Who the fuck wouldn't want to see TRANSPORTER 2 anyway? And (b) BJ's are overrated and I should expect them as standard during a relationship. Yes, I am single, why do you ask? But the fact I actually sat through this FUCKING AWFUL film almost qualifies me for removal of my cock and replacement with a fanny. In fact, I should just hand over my Man Card right now. Even worse, I have a lot of mates in the cinema and so had to sheepishly pretend I was going to see DEATH KILL ORGY 7 instead of PRIDE & GAYJUDICE. What a cunt.
Crabman has the correct and not even slightly misogynistic approach and refuses to go see these films. Why am I single and he's married? I'm even much better looking too! And I can last more than 20 seconds before rolling over and having a tab. He has never had to sit through PRIDE & PREJUDICE and never will. He has, however, made his wife watch ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK approximately four billion times. It's not even that good a film either (Only kidding, I just say these things to wind him up). The absolute drivel I have sat through is terrifying. I found ticket stubs for stuff I can't even remember seeing or even what they're about. TARNATION? What the fuck is that about? I could go on. I really could. But I won't.
Yes, I am now single, why do you ask?
I am open to offers, though, if Keira Knightley's reading. But I need a guarantee of a BJ or I'm not bothering, pet.
Yes, in case the fact that you can't guess which film this stub is for, it's PRIDE & PREJUDICE. The film starring Keira Knightley and That Cunt Off SPOOKS about love in the staid world of period unspoken love. And when I say it was a period piece, I mean I enjoyed it as much as I enjoy women's periods. It was AWFUL. Dull, slow, boring, piss-poor acting and DONALD SUTHERLAND, YOU FUCKING SELL-OUT CUNT. So you might be wondering why I, not only, watched this film but went to the cinema and see it. I'll tell you why, because of fucking women.
I have used the justification with Crabman that (a) If I sit through this shit, I could convince The Ex to sit through TRANSPORTER 2 and (b) I might get a BJ out of it. Neither of these excuses hold much water as (a) Who the fuck wouldn't want to see TRANSPORTER 2 anyway? And (b) BJ's are overrated and I should expect them as standard during a relationship. Yes, I am single, why do you ask? But the fact I actually sat through this FUCKING AWFUL film almost qualifies me for removal of my cock and replacement with a fanny. In fact, I should just hand over my Man Card right now. Even worse, I have a lot of mates in the cinema and so had to sheepishly pretend I was going to see DEATH KILL ORGY 7 instead of PRIDE & GAYJUDICE. What a cunt.
Crabman has the correct and not even slightly misogynistic approach and refuses to go see these films. Why am I single and he's married? I'm even much better looking too! And I can last more than 20 seconds before rolling over and having a tab. He has never had to sit through PRIDE & PREJUDICE and never will. He has, however, made his wife watch ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK approximately four billion times. It's not even that good a film either (Only kidding, I just say these things to wind him up). The absolute drivel I have sat through is terrifying. I found ticket stubs for stuff I can't even remember seeing or even what they're about. TARNATION? What the fuck is that about? I could go on. I really could. But I won't.
Yes, I am now single, why do you ask?
I am open to offers, though, if Keira Knightley's reading. But I need a guarantee of a BJ or I'm not bothering, pet.
|
<< Home